Case and point: Timing is Everything (now only to remember that)

Positive is a relative term. Compared to quite a few people in my life I am very positive but my mom is a very positive person so compared to her, I need to be more positive!

The thing I have found to be hardest about being positive is, you get your hopes up! I am like "yes, I am positive this is going to work out!", then it doesn't and my mom gives me the run down about God's rejection is God's protection. Ok, well I thought he wanted me to do this.

It is not always an easy thing to live but I know that everything happens in God's timing. Case and point: Steven and me!  I had Addison when I was 20, very young. I attended school the whole time I had him, to give you some perspective he was born 3 days after my last final in the Spring 04' semester. August 2005 Moved to Raleigh from Charlotte letting my parents know pretty much less than 7 days notice (not nice I know, I was seeking independence) enrolled in school, got a job and put Addison in care part time stayed home with him the other part. Side note: Addison was 15 months when I moved up here. Now being a parent and thinking about my little person, your 21 year old with your 15 month old grandchild moving 3 hours away. I would trail right behind him if he did that. Over time I have been able to ask my mom how in the world was she able to do that, she just says "you had to do it. You needed to do it on your own." Ahh insanity. In all seriousness, I grew up a lot in a short period, experienced a lot of disappointment, expectations were not met by people and there were a lot of tears and questions.

Fast forward just about a year, I decided to take a class at Peace College just a summer math class (I had been attending Wake Tech...kind of.....I stayed enrolled but did not go to class much, I stayed with Addison a lot.) I met a professor Ms. Peacock, (yes, real name) she was my trigonometry teacher, she would let me bring Addison to class if I needed. Hey don't judge other girls got to bring their dogs!!! He would sit there tiny in the huge chair next to me eating gold fish and running trucks over them to make crumbs (dirt). I made an A in the class and decided this is where I need to be, I applied to become a full time student and was accepted!!! Yaay! Go me! I went to school full time, worked 40 hours at the daycare Addison attended went home made him dinner and then did homework. Rinse and repeat, rinse and repeat!  There were sooo many days when I called my mom and said "hey look I saw a commercial I can do (enter whatever easy way out) in less than a year", she would always say: "Sara, you have come this far. You are almost done."

One of my classes (jogging, yes I am serious) we ran through a neighborhood the name escapes me right now every Monday, Wednesday and Friday. I tried to stay focused on school it was soo soo hard but I did and for the most part I did well in school, I took Spanish I and II, twice for each class and took statistics twice. Both of those classes really made me want to quit on multiple occasions, my teachers held me to the same standards as my peers and a lot of my peers only had to worry about waking up to go to classes. That is not true for all of them but most. A lot of boring normal life things happen fast forward to Jan 2008, I am in my 2nd to last semester picking an internship and decide to take one with the Red Cross in their disaster services department. I worked, completed my internship and continued to be a mom.

STOP!

Here is where God's timing comes in, June 2008 I took some time off for personal reasons and returned to work in July. There was a girl, who worked with me and was a triplet. As I came in from my internship we are sitting playing with the infants she looks at me and says "Did you know Mackenzie's (my niece) dad is a twin?" Not giving it a second thought other than cool a twin because twins are not common, well not like they are now. Well Mackenzie's mom comes and picks her up and I was making small talk because it is weird not to when you have just spent the day with their kid, I say "That is cool, girl who shall remain nameless told me your husband is a twin!" She can correct me if I am wrong but I think she said "yea, are you single?" I was like "ummm, just got out of a relationship so not looking for anything serious but I am open to the possibility." Well, the other girl's jaw dropped because she was a triplet she wanted to marry a twin or something that is what she said. Like a dummy, I asked Ladonna, "what does he look like?" her response "like my husband"-they are identical twins if you have not seen them, they really look almost just alike ummm yea...this is where it gets funny so Steven and I talk on Myspace (yes, myspace) for a couple of weeks back and forth. Then he is going to come with his brother to pick up his niece, strange, I know. So anyway, we met in person and the next day had ice cream. Addison had just turned 4 and ran around the water fountain the whole time and didn't eat his ice cream. Steven tells me now that made him mad. I say it just gave him a glimpse into the life of a 4 year old. I don't know if he would say so but, when we talked ( I am pretty sure it was for a long time) it seriously felt like I had know this person forever. So we are dating and getting to know each other and this is where the timing is everything part: we find out there were so many opportunities that we could have run (almost literally) into each other and met but did not. The neighborhood I was running in, he was living there at the time. Ran by his house Monday, Wednesday and Friday! We worked at the same place (different locations) for a while I attended trainings at his location. We had so much growing to do between the times we could have met and actually did. I think about that first year of college, if we had met it would not have worked. He will agree, it never would have worked. We both had so much growing to do.  It is all pretty cool.

We are married now. I know for a fact God had it come together when it was right, not before and not a moment after. He honestly came in right when I needed someone most, the last few months of that year were really hard and he was there, many times I was like you can leave it is not going to be a fun or easy ride, he never went away. I mean really never went away.

I know that timing and having the faith in timing is everything. But, positively waiting on timing is hard! It is hard in all aspects, love, friendships, promotions, answers, you name it-we want it now. PLEASE. :-)